Thursday, November 17, 2016

Don't try this at home

OMGYOUGUYS. An excellent Thursday all around: the sky remained pitch black all day and since I refuse to turn on the lights at noon, I got to work covered in shadows. What cosiness!

I also got to try a new (to me) Pret Christmas sandwich: the vegan baguette. This was entirely a mistake - a lone sandwich left on the wrong shelf, and they don't come labelled - but when it came home and I opened it up and saw the error, I maturely decided not to go with my knee-jerk reaction (to fling it against the wall and slump to the floor wailing) and try it. After all, I *did* want to try them all, and maybe I would love it and want to eat it always! Maybe this is the first of many vegan food preferences and I could evolve into that person who's all 'Dahhhling, not the pork, you know I favour chickpeas.'

But then I put it in my mouth. And I don't know what went wrong here - was this an end-of-day creation, and the human who built it high/drunk/lazy/psychotic? - but this was AN ABOMINATION OF A SANDWICH. The parsnip puree was unholy, the carrots anemic, and the rocket - well, you can see the rocket - clearly wanted out of there as much as I did:

Not pictured: joy. Fulfilment. Any reason to live.

I did eat the whole thing - I can't throw away food - but I had to add bacon and cheese and tomatoes and sriracha to mask the wreckage. SUPER healthy, totally won. Definitely vegan now.

(If anyone has had a positive experience of this sandwich, please do let me know. Maybe this was a random abhorrent act against nature and I should try again.) 

And other exciting things happened yesterday! One, I had my first guest blogger, who delightfully opted out of using English and went full Kerouwackian Welsh, much to my delight. Look at this guy, hard at work in the coffee shop!

Best part: didn't even have to proofread it.

And our winter logs arrived! 35 bags of firewood delivered to our front door by the most cheerful Log Deliveryman one could imagine. I cleverly decided to leave them there all day, basking in the sun (see that ray of light below?) and waited until it got dark and started pouring rain to shift them - one by one - to the back garden. It only took me about 40 soaking minutes of tracking mud and splinters across the house so I think we can all admit that I made the right choice. Each bag is around 12 kilos so I would also like to point out that I moved 420 KILOS OF WOOD BY MYSELF. Between this and my newfound vegan-ness (is that the right word? Someone tell me, I'm new to this lifestyle), I am surely the healthiest person I know. 

They mock me, looking all snug and smelling so nice, right before STABBING ME TO PIECES.

Okay, I need to go - I've got a 7 o'clock dinner reservation and then tickets to a jazz show and I am definitely not fit to be seen by other humans at the moment - but I hope you have a wonderful evening!

Big hugs and lots of love,

No comments:

Post a Comment